Monday, May 21, 2012

The good. The bad. The ugly.

Quick post here. Just a few things on my mind. I have 10 minutes. Literally, until my computer battery runs out.


The Good.
The good right now? 


We have a beautiful home. Every time I come home to it, I am in awe that it is ours. OURS. It especially feels like it is ours since tomorrow I am writing out our first mortgage check. I am getting antsy not being able to decorate. We don't have the money or the supplies. And I can't get very creative with what I do have when I can barely find the time to do the dishes daily. Someday.... Someday I will have the time and resources. Matt won't even let me hang things because the walls are plaster. ugh. 


We have awesome neighbors. Right next to us is a couple that has two small children, a little girl Max's age and a little boy, Gabriel's age. A & T are laid back, and we don't scare them! We had them over for dinner this week and it was a lot of fun. I have good conversation with A and I learn so much from her about natural remedies and better eating. Heck, I made quinoa tonight! Our other neighbors on the corner are super cool too. J & M have six kids, love everyone, have a welcoming front yard that everyone is drawn to, and a super cool house. M understands what it is like being a stay-at-home-mama, she sympathizes with me, she encourages me. She is an amazing listener, I almost feel like I have been to a therapist appointment after I get done talking to her. 


The first of many dinners at our house with neighbors, friends and family

I'm going to California next week!! Me, Maximo and Eli are flying out to spend a week with Uncle Pete, Auntie M, Jackson (or "Jax" as Maximo calls him). I am so excited to have a little vaycay. I am so excited. I will be spending our 8th wedding anniversary there, with my uncle, on his birthday. Matt is a little sad, but he'll get over it :) Gabriel will hang out with his grandma Sue and my mom (yaya) on the days that Matt has to work. 


The Bad.
I've been fighting an infection for the last four months. It is from nursing Eli. It sucks. I have been on five different prescriptions. I'm even on a special diet that I can't eat sugar or flour on. I just continue to pray for healing. Help me God.


Relationships are strained in my life right now. And, it sucks. I don't want to wish for the days past, when everything was "normal"... but then again, sometimes I do. God help me. 


I feel like a mean mom lately. I am irritable (the diet fuels that). I hate messes. I hate making dinner. Except for I enjoyed making the quinoa tonight. Maybe it's just that I hate cleaning up after. I need to try to be a nicer mom. Less yelling. God, help me. 


The Ugly.
I got my hair cut. I feel like it's not really what I had expected. Not ugly per say, but close. It'll grow out right?




That's all I got. Tomorrow is a new day. His grace is sufficient.




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