time to stop and smell the... little boys.

life as a stay-at-home mom has been rough lately. i get irritated so easily. messes drive me iNsAne, spilled milk offends me and i swear if max has one more melt down over the fact that i will not allow him to wear gabriel's size 2T track pants, i may just lose it. gabriel is learning the arms-folded-across-his-chest "NO FAIR!" argument. eli is mad if i put him in the high chair or jumperoo. he wants to either be crawling around the house and pulling himself up at the cupboards or book shelf, or he wants to be held. when eli is mad, he yells. a deep yelling cry that i am sure the neighbors can hear across the street. meal times are loud and messy. 

nap time and bed time are my favorite

 parts of the day lately. 

my friends are distant, lately, due to busy lives and trying to manage kids as well. i'm so grateful for my neighbors. they are my life lines at times, my only adult interaction during my day and when matt is gone. i'd be in bad shape if i didn't have them. i thank God for my neighborhood friends.

so, with all of that said, today i decided to slow down, and smell the roses boys. we got our front porch cleared out for the most part, and we have set up a sweet little play area dedicated to boys and toys and books and messes. this is so helpful to me. this morning we put out a blanket, read books, played cars, and enjoyed each other. i captured some of it on my camera. it shouldn't take such deliberate effort, but for me lately, it does. life is hard. relationships are hard. responsibility is hard. all of this effects me, and my mothering. and i need to remember to stop, and enjoy more moments with these kiddos. they will grow up fast, and i don't want to have missed out. 

today i choose to let go of everything 

that is stressing me out, and i choose to hand it over to 

my daddy God. 

(usually i prefer other translations but the message said it well)

Matthew 11:28-30

The Message (MSG)

 "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? 

Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. 

I'll show you how to take a real rest. 

Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. 

Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. 

Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

sweet baby e.

skinned knees, bandaids, bare feet, trains and cars. all boy.

maximo joe, creating car collisions, complete with sound effects.

they are learning to play together

brothers

cooking a meal for mama

The good. The bad. The ugly.

Quick post here. Just a few things on my mind. I have 10 minutes. Literally, until my computer battery runs out.


The Good.
The good right now? 


We have a beautiful home. Every time I come home to it, I am in awe that it is ours. OURS. It especially feels like it is ours since tomorrow I am writing out our first mortgage check. I am getting antsy not being able to decorate. We don't have the money or the supplies. And I can't get very creative with what I do have when I can barely find the time to do the dishes daily. Someday.... Someday I will have the time and resources. Matt won't even let me hang things because the walls are plaster. ugh. 


We have awesome neighbors. Right next to us is a couple that has two small children, a little girl Max's age and a little boy, Gabriel's age. A & T are laid back, and we don't scare them! We had them over for dinner this week and it was a lot of fun. I have good conversation with A and I learn so much from her about natural remedies and better eating. Heck, I made quinoa tonight! Our other neighbors on the corner are super cool too. J & M have six kids, love everyone, have a welcoming front yard that everyone is drawn to, and a super cool house. M understands what it is like being a stay-at-home-mama, she sympathizes with me, she encourages me. She is an amazing listener, I almost feel like I have been to a therapist appointment after I get done talking to her. 

The first of many dinners at our house with neighbors, friends and family

I'm going to California next week!! Me, Maximo and Eli are flying out to spend a week with Uncle Pete, Auntie M, Jackson (or "Jax" as Maximo calls him). I am so excited to have a little vaycay. I am so excited. I will be spending our 8th wedding anniversary there, with my uncle, on his birthday. Matt is a little sad, but he'll get over it :) Gabriel will hang out with his grandma Sue and my mom (yaya) on the days that Matt has to work. 

The Bad.
I've been fighting an infection for the last four months. It is from nursing Eli. It sucks. I have been on five different prescriptions. I'm even on a special diet that I can't eat sugar or flour on. I just continue to pray for healing. Help me God.


Relationships are strained in my life right now. And, it sucks. I don't want to wish for the days past, when everything was "normal"... but then again, sometimes I do. God help me. 


I feel like a mean mom lately. I am irritable (the diet fuels that). I hate messes. I hate making dinner. Except for I enjoyed making the quinoa tonight. Maybe it's just that I hate cleaning up after. I need to try to be a nicer mom. Less yelling. God, help me. 


The Ugly.
I got my hair cut. I feel like it's not really what I had expected. Not ugly per say, but close. It'll grow out right?




That's all I got. Tomorrow is a new day. His grace is sufficient.

It's been a while

(It has been almost six weeks since I have written. We got a little busy... with packing up, moving, unpacking, settling in, etc.)

 Mid-April we said good bye to the sweet house on Van Buren that kept us warm over the winter as we searched for our house. 

This house helped confirmed that we wanted to stay in the Hamline-Midway neighborhood.

Our new house on Englewood Avenue!

We closed on Friday, April 13th. 

A little tour... These are the "before" pictures

our kitchen (taken as I stood in the dining room)

 Kitchen (taken from the back door)

 dining room (taken from the kitchen)

 living room (taken from the foyer)

 living room (taken from the dining room)

 foyer

 our bedroom 

 bathroom 

 more bathroom

gabriel and eli's room

max's room

There is much yet to be done... I cannot WAIT to decorate and use all of my pintrest ideas. These were taken a few weeks ago, so our kitchen already looks so much more "us". I look forward to posting our "after" pictures. Someday.


Two weeks after we moved in we celebrated Gabriel's second birthday with family and a few close friends. We also had our new next-door-neighbors join in on the fun. Pictured below is Gabriel with the Chase twins T-Bone and Beckett to the left, and his new buddy Jakey from next-door to the right. It was a celebration indeed. God has been so good and so faithful to us. 

Hoping I have time this weekend to do some more writing. I've had a lot on my heart, and I feel like there is so much in store for our family and my life. It's exciting, and scary at the same time. Lots of change a'comin'...