be still.

This morning I woke up and decided to push aside my bad attitude over it being Monday.

(It was hard, I had to push really really hard)

I came downstairs and my husband had made coffee. So that helped.

Then I went and sat on the porch and I did something that I do not do often enough. I opened up my phone and started my morning by reading today's devotion from my favorite book Jesus Calling. Here is an excerpt:

I want you to know how safe and secure you are in My Presence. 

that is a fact, totally independent of your feelings...

Although My Presence is a guaranteed promise, that does not necessarily change your feelings. When you forget I am with you,you may experience loneliness or fear. It is through awareness of My Presence that Peace displaces negative feelings. Practice the discipline of walking consciously with Me through each day.

No more than 5 seconds later my 1st grader began to cop an attitude about having to get out the door to the bus stop. Instead of beginning my usual morning speech about how "we all have responsibilities and even though we don't feel like it sometimes, we still have to go to work/school/etc..." I told him I'd walk him out to the bus stop.

As we walked hand-in-hand I told him that I loved him. That I am proud of him. That God is always with him, even when he is having a hard time at school or when he feels alone or anxious.

The sun was shining, the air was crisp and it was a perfectly sweet moment.

As soon as we got to the bus stop he ran over to his friends. Apparently it's not cool to stand at the bus stop holding your mother's hand. When the bus came he sat in the seat the faced me and secretly blew kisses to me until they had passed me by. I love that we got to have a sweet and peaceful beginning to our day.

On my way back home I was met by Gabriel and Eli coming out of the house. They had dressed themselves and were without shoes. We took a little walk down the block and back.

Again, another perfectly sweet moment.

I know I say it ALL.THE.TIME. This season is oh-so-hard. The whining, the potty accidents, the constant need for snacks, the messes, the fighting, the difficult bedtimes, the long days. I make it harder on myself by trying to do it on my own. My Father God is there beside me the whole time but instead I choose to feel alone in it and to try to take it on by myself.

I had a new friend over today and she saw my little poster (I saw it on pintrest and recreated, it's not my own design!) She asked me what it meant to me and I had to think for a minute.

I try to fight through so many of the hard moments on my own, which is dumb. I need to stop. I need to breathe and chill out. I need to seek out how God wants me to deal with it. I need to acknowledge that He is there, ready to fight the battle for me. Whether the battle is a whiny kid, an unexpected expense, a fight with my husband or someone close disappointing me: I need to be still and allow Him to take it on.

Be still. Be still. Be still. I think this is what God is trying to show me in this season.

A few months ago it would've been my dad's birthday. It was a hard week, I missed him so much. There was a necklace at Groundswell that had been on display for a long time. I knew I needed it.

I wear it almost everyday. Just as a reminder.

Alright, well, here's to practicing the discipline of walking consciously with Him through each day.
Be encouraged.