A sweet grandmother shared this:
Such a Great post and comments! I raised 6 wonderful sons, and am now a grandmother. Most boys LOVE noise,action and getting physical (wrestling). My only regret is not allowing for more of this natural and needed behavior at home. Along with not fully appreciating their constant energy and enthusiasm. No need to apologize for their healthy zest for life, but certainly okay to apologize to them for your off days as a mom and assure them of your unconditional love! Children are blessings every day and they only have one childhood! Carry on with confidence and a smile!
A great response from a mama who painted a vivid and beautiful picture of what her life looks like:
Wow, thank you. I have a 2-year-old wonderfully crazy little boy. He is our 2nd child after a very quiet little girl who is about to turn 21. He is wild and crazy , crabby if he doesn't nap, growls like wild animals, plays until he literally falls into my arms at night to sleep. He is loud and unpredictable when he runs in circles with his eyes closed. He is also sweet and says hi to anyone, shows compassion when his cousins cry, kisses me every time I ask and runs to me yelling Mommy like I am the most important thing EVER. I do apologize for him all the time. I even apologize for him when I know it is not that big of a deal. I do discipline, I do teach him to be respectful. Many meals on a night out have been eaten alone because my husband took our screaming/growling dino out to the car to watch Lion King and have a backseat picnic. Thank you for opening my eyes. He is a little boy and I need to know that it is ok for him to be a little crazy -- not disrespectful on my part and ruin everyone's day around me -- but a squeal here or there is all right, wanting to open a door alone is ok, wanting to explore new places and "talking" with everyone is fine. I will apologize much less.
A mom who was blessed with children with some special needs gave great perspective here:
My children have medical issues that mean I parent differently than I would if they were totally "normal" kids, and I find that it makes me a far more open parent in other ways. Their lives are so restricted by food that when they have the opportunity to run, play, and BE normal kids, well, I let them!
By no means am I encouraging "bad" behavior - I think we're all in agreement that letting kids run wild is not okay. But my oldest son is only 3 and seems to be just as stubborn as his Mama - he doesn't really learn anything until he has done it for himself and experienced the negative repercussion personally!
I'm tired of apologizing for it. I don't let him run wild, and I make him clean up his messes and apologize when we're out in public and he's done something that disturbs another person. But for being him? For being enthusiastic TIMES 100? For screaming in joy because he's riding in the grocery cart? For letting me know exactly how disappointed he is in having to leave the store when he was just getting his play-groove on? Well, that's just a 3 year old being a 3 year old.
And I'm not apologizing for that. My son is learning how to function in the world. The grown-ups around us are already supposed to know. They need to show patience to the little ones trying to learn the world - and to the Moms who are struggling to show them the world while not ticking everyone else off simultaneously! :-)
And one more from a mom that knows her stuff:
There is a massive difference in instructing a child and losing it because they do the things children inevitably do. Little boys are often faced with unfair negative associations and unfair expectations. When adults can't even always control themselves- or their words, for that matter- it's a lot to ask a small child to do. I should add before I sound like my children run wild that they are complimented on their behavior and manners often.
By no means am I encouraging "bad" behavior - I think we're all in agreement that letting kids run wild is not okay. But my oldest son is only 3 and seems to be just as stubborn as his Mama - he doesn't really learn anything until he has done it for himself and experienced the negative repercussion personally!
I'm tired of apologizing for it. I don't let him run wild, and I make him clean up his messes and apologize when we're out in public and he's done something that disturbs another person. But for being him? For being enthusiastic TIMES 100? For screaming in joy because he's riding in the grocery cart? For letting me know exactly how disappointed he is in having to leave the store when he was just getting his play-groove on? Well, that's just a 3 year old being a 3 year old.
And I'm not apologizing for that. My son is learning how to function in the world. The grown-ups around us are already supposed to know. They need to show patience to the little ones trying to learn the world - and to the Moms who are struggling to show them the world while not ticking everyone else off simultaneously! :-)
And one more from a mom that knows her stuff:
There is a massive difference in instructing a child and losing it because they do the things children inevitably do. Little boys are often faced with unfair negative associations and unfair expectations. When adults can't even always control themselves- or their words, for that matter- it's a lot to ask a small child to do. I should add before I sound like my children run wild that they are complimented on their behavior and manners often.
Have a great weekend. Are you doing anything fun? I get to go to Zumba, a 6 year old birthday party for my sweet friend Tamrah's little boy, and I get two girls' nights! One tonight one Sunday night.
Check back on Monday for another healthy family trait that I will be sharing.
Peace.
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