I will survive spring break [I'm just not sure how... yet]

This raising boys thing is so dang hard lately. I think it's a combination of the weather being cold again, and the kids getting tired of school. We need summer to get here. Next week is spring break but I'm already scared. I have three boys to entertain for a week, and not a whole lot planned.

This weekend Matt and I are enjoying our quarterly kids-free weekend that my mom and her husband give us. Once every season we drop the kids off on a Friday night and they get brought back to us Sunday afternoon. It's a time to reconcile, relax, rest, drink wine, eat out and enjoy some peace and quiet... and a clean house.

After a seriously rough week, I dropped those boys off so fast but left with a heavy heart and a million thoughts racing through my mind... I won't miss them. I'm so glad I don't have to do bed time for the next two nights. I'm so mean... no THEY are mean. Max is disrespectful. I'm tired of Gabriel's whining.... I'm tired of the constant mess... I'm a horrible mom! I'm not fun. I don't do enough. I don't bring them to do fun things. They are always bored. How the hell am I going to survive spring break next week?!?  They ARE sweet, sometimes... I will miss them... but seriously how will I survive next week? 

I got home and one of my favorite friends and fellow boy-moms of three sent me a great link to an article by Jen Hatmaker. Read it here. You'll be glad that you did. It reminded me that YES I WILL SURVIVE this parenting thing, and spring break. And maybe I should find some Tab.

They will survive. I will survive.  #Jesustakethewheel

Here is how we have been surviving lately:

They discovered how to scale the hall walls. Great. This
counts as magical childhood right?

Eli is loving Big Hero 6 lately.

Gabriel and his fashion sense: plaid, stripes and cowboy boots.

Look who got glasses!

I'm not sure what this G.I. Joe is about to get into. 

Heck yes we celebrated Dairy Queen's 75th anniversary with free cones in 40 degree weather.

I had to throw this one in: All the Gaitan kids after grandpa Gil's funeral.
David and Sam are happy individuals, I swear....
the ones they were smiling in I didn't look as cute in
There just weren't any pictures with them smiling.

just EW.

Today started out really well.

I got up, got kids ready for school, walked them to the bus stop. The sun was shining and I was encouraged that the day would go well.
I got the gym for the third day in a row this week (after 2 1/2 weeks of not going. ew.)... then my two friends came over for breakfast and catching-up. It was a pretty sweet morning.

And then I feel like it all fell a part. I had some work to get done on the computer and I let the boys dump out the bin of Playmobile stuff. I was desperate for a moment of productivity. When it was time to clean up, they panicked and lost their ish. Eli had an accident. And then Gabriel had an accident. And when Gabe has one accident, it means 3 more are to follow. Little dude has issues with pooping lately.

ew.

Then I found my blush painted on the wall. And the stool pushed up to my dresser (which means Gabriel was snooping through my stuff) and the list continues. just more ew.

Then I started to panic about my homework for my Exodus group that I am in right now. Ya know, the group I was so excited to be a part of because I was so excited to be gutted and rebuilt this year?

(if you are confused about all this talk of "gutting and rebuilding" read my last post here)

more ew.

Being gutted SUCKS. MY FAULTY WIRES ARE HANGING OUT ALL OVER THE PLACE AND I AM SPRINGING LEAKS FROM ALL OVER THE PLACE AND MY ROOF NEEDS REPAIR AND THERE IS MOLD AND TERMITES AND ON TOP OF THAT THERE ARE SQUATTERS LIVING IN MY BASEMENT AND IT'S A FREAKING MESS.

I hate this. I wish I could go away for a month to do all of this work and inner healing. But I can't. Kids need me. Husband needs me. Life will not GIVE ME A BREAK and on top of it all, really amazing opportunities continue to arise. But I am being stretched in all directions. There is no time for rest. 

So I press on. And I apologize a lot to my kids and remind them that I make [lots] of mistakes but still love them like crazy. And I trust my husband will love me through this and give me lots of grace. And I count on my friends to understand this season of my life and support me. And I look to the good Lord to keep me from going insane and I believe in His promises over my life. 

And I also listen to a lot of Taylor Swift. My friend Jocelyn and I joke that One Thousand Gifts and Taylor Swift are crucial to this season. #1000giftsandtswifts

So there it is. My update on all this renovation stuff. just ew. 

p.s. my trip to California was AMAZING and I hope to make time to write about it here soon.
p.p.s. my sweet grandpa died a few days after I returned from California. So last week we were in Chicago for the funeral. 
p.p.p.s. kids are finally asleep. I survived another day. Thank God. 
p.p.p.p.s. Gabriel only had two more accidents after that, not three. #Jesustakethewheel