Progress is being made... (kinda.)

So right now Matt is meeting with our mortgage broker, turning in all of our paperwork, signing things and discussing details. The bank (that owns our home) still has not let us know about the final price, which is a bummer since our mortgage broker cannot move forward with the loan stuff until she knows the actual price of the home. So, again, we wait.

Waiting is so hard, and the longer we wait, the more anxiety wells up inside of me. Honestly, I think it's because I have known such profound loss over the last 18 months that I hold on to the big stuff lightly. I feel like this is all going to be swooped away from me in a moments's notice, and that we will be left in survival mode, once again, scrambling for cover. Today I am dealing with a lot of emotions about my dad, my mom, and what I assume life would look like if nothing had happened. It's hard not to. I feel wounded and bruised up. My heart aches.

Our pastor shared once about how mother eagles teach their babes to fly. They boot them out of the nest, and allow for the babies to fall until they are about to hit the ground. At the last moment mama comes to the rescue though. She swoops her babe up before he hits the ground. Eventually the baby bird learns to flap it's wings, and is able to catch the wind as he is falling. Soon he begins to fly. I feel like I'm falling right now. But every time I feel like I have been falling, God is always there to swoop me up.

I'm trusting I'm about to get swooped any minute.

 

Waiting... waiting.. waiting...

I feel like we've been in a place of waiting for the last 4+ years. We're finally in the last phase I think. Waiting for our new house. We found our house almost two months ago. We had seen about 10 houses in person, and had checked out hundreds on-line. When we walked in to the house, we felt like it was the one. Great location, nice open floor plan on the first level, great backyard, nice big bathroom, huge dining room... it seemed great. The bedrooms were a little small, but like my friend Heidi told me, bedrooms are for sleeping. How much time do we really spend in our rooms? We saw it on a Sunday, and on Monday we went back to put in an offer. Well four other offers were submitted that weekend too, so the bidding war began. We offered full price, but a week went by and we heard nothing, so we assumed we didn't get it. The day after Valentine's Day we found out we got it. Except for I had already completely detached from the house. So I was excited, but not super excited. The anxiety set in... was this really the best house?! Buying a house is so stressful. But I needed to remember that I did love the house the first and second times I saw it. I still can't believe that it is going to be ours. Probably due to the fact that the bank is working extremely slow, and now a month and a half later we are still waiting for an answer on the price being reduced. We know our closing date will be by April 12. But who knows. Until then, I continue to pin ideas on my pintrest board. I am so excited to decorate my house. MY house. OUR house. God has been so good to us in this waiting period. He's helped us to get our finances in order, pay off a lot of debt. He's strengthened our family and our faith. He's provided for our every need. He's always watching over us.