Speak life.

Today I had to take Max in to the doctor for the third time about a rash that he has. I had to rush around to find a babysitter for the other kids, and it was just really inconvenient for me. I was so fortunate to have a neighbor come to my rescue and keep an eye on the other kids while we were gone. I was also fortunate to be witness to something cool that I wanted to share.

We got to the doctor's office (and being that we live in the city and utilize our local clinics, grocery stores, etc.) Max and I were surrounded by all different nationalities and socioeconomic statuses. I love it. I love hearing the different languages. I love that I may not speak someone else's language but that I can still be warm and friendly by smiling. I love that Max is playing along side of a child who's parents are from the other side of the world.

There was a very young couple sitting with a little girl that was maybe a year old. My heart ached as I thought about how difficult it must be to be so young and already have a little one. Then the nurse brought out a newborn and handed him to the two young parents. She told them that the baby did very well but that now he is hungry and needs to breast feed. I am assuming the baby had just gotten circumcised.

The young little mama went back with the nurse to feed her baby and the dad and other little one stayed in the waiting room. Soon the little girl began to fuss and the father asked the security guard if he could go back to the room where the mom and baby were.

The security guard at the clinic is the sweetest man. He's an older man that is always chatting with the regulars in the waiting room. Making small talk and asking people how they are doing. He is warm and welcoming every time we walk in the front door.

Soon the young dad walked back out in to the waiting room alone and sat down. Seconds later the mom came out and said "I can't nurse the baby and watch her at the same time. I need you to help me keep her out here." She seemed frazzled, irritated and exhausted. My heart felt for her. I so know how that feels. Her boyfriend went on to get irritated with her telling her to settle down and that the little girl wants to be with her and that she doesn't need to snap, that this is why he should have just stayed home. That mama just walked her little girl up to him, handed her off and went back to finish feeding her newborn.

The security guard was standing there near the dad and the dad vented to him. Saying he can't handle much more of this and that he can't stand when she acts like this. The security guard went on to say "Yeah man, I know. I been dealing with the same woman now for over 24 years."

I caught myself feeling mad that the security guard was affirming this guy's bad attitude. But then he went on to tell this young dad, "But you know what? It's all worth it in the end." The dad said "yeah I don't know about that..." and the security guard went on to speak life in to this young lost dad. He went on to tell him that it IS all worth it in the end when the kids are there for you since you were there for them. He told him that he's just gotta hang in there. He didn't sit there and belittle him, or tell him that he was wrong to feel what he was feeling. He just affirmed him by telling him that yes it is hard, that he understood, that he had been there, and that you get through it.

The dad listened and agreed. He picked up his little girl and told the security officer to let his girlfriend know what he was walking around with the little girl in the lobby.

After the dad left I turned to that sweet older man and told him "Thank you. Thank you for speaking life in to that daddy and encouraging him." He went on to tell me that young African American dads need all the encouragement they can get. He told me that most of them don't know what they are doing since their dads left long ago. He told me about how he had to be a single dad for a few years to his SIX KIDS when his wife got depressed and hooked on drugs.

Just let that sink in.

We spend so much time judging people and assuming things about them. We think we know their story and we group them with everyone else that looks and acts like them. We just shake our heads or turn our cheek and hope for the best.

And then here is this security guard. Doing his job keeping the clinic safe. Speaking truth and life in to people who need just a kind greeting, or advice on life. Who knows if what he said changed the course of that young man's outlook on life and parenthood? Or if it even made a difference at all? It doesn't matter.

He is going above and beyond the position and job he has been entrusted with. And I am sure he is making a difference in this world one conversation at a time.

Today he is my hero. I hope I can be more like him.
Our words are so powerful. Speak life. Speak truth. Speak understanding.
We all have such amazing life stories that give us credit when circumstances arise that we can attest to.

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